That is it, I've had enough I am leaving..

[woodsman86]

AS - it's a bit more than that. This one may have started it all. It's kind of long, but you can get the flavor of it rather quickly. http://lonelymachines.org/mall-ninjas/

Just WOW! is all I can say. This needs to be turned into a book, a guaranteed best seller. I have already started emailing the link.

[Batch]

Well,unlike these mall nijas, I am a survival expert. You see, I have been surviving every day since I was born. That's over 40 years of survival experting! Ask me anything, seriously.

Yes, you mam. Why yes, I did stay in a Holiday Inn Express one time. Even got a discount on the rate. Hiyaaa!!!

Is that how you spell mam? It doesn't look right. But, spell check didn't correct it for me...

[catfish10101]

I just read through that entire page (link) and it took about 8 beers, not counting the 2 or 3 that spilled as I fell out of my chair laughing. Just wanted to say thanks, I needed that!!

[Ole WV Coot]

Don't know how I missed this, but I think I will shop online from now on. Tough crowd at the mall, too tough for me. I know a two yr old brat that I can bribe to teach me to maybe sneak into a mall like he does, crawling under the dresses.

[woodsman86]

I am so glad I took the easy road of fighting insurgency in Iraq rather than becoming a security guard at Bed, Bath, & Beyond. I guess I have been stuck on base to long and did not realize the horrible population of sample stealing juveniles of the civilian world. I sure hope Hollywood finds this guy and turns him into an urban Bear Grylls; that is a show I would watch!

[Rick]

Those shoplifters are just the tip of the iceberg. There is a place in the dark corridors of the mall where employees fear to tread. Where the intrepid men and women of the mall security forces put their reputations on the line. Where security cameras and hidden microphones capture the dreaded nether world of ... employee theft. (que scary music).

[woodsman86]

I don't even want to think of the heat they are packing or how many pairs of Kevlar underwear I would have to wear to protect myself.

[Rick]

Kevlar underwear? Hmmm. Wonder if they make a thong out of Kevlar? Time to Google.

[crashdive123]

Kevlar underwear? Hmmm. Wonder if they make a thong out of Kevlar? Time to Google.

Here ya go.
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If you made it this far, tsk, tsk, tsk.

[Ole WV Coot]

I am so glad I took the easy road of fighting insurgency in Iraq rather than becoming a security guard at Bed, Bath, & Beyond. I guess I have been stuck on base to long and did not realize the horrible population of sample stealing juveniles of the civilian world. I sure hope Hollywood finds this guy and turns him into an urban Bear Grylls; that is a show I would watch!

Yep, younger folks take the easy way out every time. You're gonna be forced to stand up and be counted when you get back. You probably will be pelted with shoes since the malls have more of them than anything. By the way THANKS! We appreciate your service.

[Justin Case]

Here ya go.
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If you made it this far, tsk, tsk, tsk.

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Guests can not see images in the messages. Please register in the forum.

[BENESSE]

Rick's lost some weight.
That diet really works!

[Rick]

See that?! He did it again.

[Winnie]

WOWSF-FART are not impressed! Justin, corner, NOW!!

[Justin Case]

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[finallyME]

Mall ninja..pffff. You should check out the Hill Billy ninja.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Guigc...embedded#at=47

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bf2w6...eature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cd6Ej...eature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hb_Hd...eature=related

[nell67]

Guests can not see images in the messages. Please register in the forum.

Last chance JIC,or the women of Wilderness-survival.net are gonna descend upon you in a wrath of fury that the world has never seen before.

[Justin Case]

Mall ninja..pffff. You should check out the Hill Billy ninja.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Guigc...embedded#at=47

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bf2w6...eature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cd6Ej...eature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hb_Hd...eature=related

LOL LOL,, That guy could make Money on stage !

[woodsman86]

Yep, younger folks take the easy way out every time. You're gonna be forced to stand up and be counted when you get back. You probably will be pelted with shoes since the malls have more of them than anything. By the way THANKS! We appreciate your service.

Thanks

I'm not going anywhere near the mall now. I don't even want to drive on the road in front for fear of getting caught in the cross fire between the Ninjas and Shredder.

I wonder if he is the one who taught Chuck Norris how to fight?

"Did you know: Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas and Chuck Norris wears Mall Ninja pajamas"

[Winnie]

We had our very own Mall Ninja for a time, What was his name? Kamikaze or something. He had Youtube and everything!