My Honey Looked at Me and said, "You're Gonna' Kill Me......"

[Ken]

You shouldn't be so concerned about how to convince her to let you cook the ducks, but how to convince her on how the ducks got behind the car when you pulling out of the driveway

The way I pull in and out of our driveway......... she'll definitely believe it!

[Ken]

Baby Ducks don't quack. They chirp. They Chirp LOUD. ALL THREE DUCKS CHIRP LOUD.

[Swamprat1958]

Every time I have had someone cook me duck it's been extremely greasy. I do not know if it's the way they are cooking it or what. One day I want someone that can cook it correctly and try it.

Just come on down to Louisiana and we can give you a post-doctorate in non-greasy duck!

[FVR]

Roasted Duck.

Daffy never tasted so good.

[crashdive123]

Roasted Duck.

Daffy never tasted so good.

Oh, now that's just Goofy.

[Badawg]

Duck eggs are awesome. They apparently are highly sought after for fine baking. Taste fine over easy on toast too.

[Ken]

Duck eggs are awesome. They apparently are highly sought after for fine baking. Taste fine over easy on toast too.

She also came home with a couple of dozen eggs. The chicken egg variety. Biggest ones I've seen in years. The eggs, that is.

[LowKey]

Noisy, dirty, and messy. But they love snails and slugs. Your garden will love the ducks. If you can keep them from eating the greens...

The ducks down the lake never shut up this time of year. All night long they go on and on and on...
How long before the neighbors complain Ken?

[Ken]

How long before the neighbors complain Ken?

None really close enough. I hope.

[trax]

Duck eggs are awesome. .... Taste fine over easy on toast too.

You got that right, Ken wring their little necks and have at it, she'll get over it. Not like they're a real pet, they don't even have four legs.

[finallyME]

What kind are they. I have only had ducks when I was a kid. My parents had two females. I asked my grandpa about it, and he said there is only one type of duck you want in your yard, a runner. Runners are leaner and like to....well...run. They will spend most of their time scouring the yard for bugs to eat. Our garden loved them. They will eat bugs even when being chased . Other ducks tend to be more liberal and sit around and poop in one place and wait for food handouts. If you don't have runners, eat them and go buy runners to replace them. Then, both you and your wife are happy .

[Ken]

What kind are they.

No idea. Even the lady my honey got them from wasn't sure. Guess we gotta' wait 'till they get a little bigger to find out.

I'm sure they all taste pretty much the same.

[finallyME]

Three guys die together in an accident and go to heaven. When they get there, St. Peter says, "We only have one rule here in heaven: Don't step on the ducks!"

So they enter heaven, and sure enough, there are ducks all over the place. It is almost impossible not to step on a duck, and although they try their best to avoid them, the first guy accidentally steps on one.

Along comes St. Peter with the ugliest woman he has ever seen. St. Peter chains them together and says, "Your punishment for stepping on a duck is to spend eternity chained to the ugly woman!"

The next day, the second guy steps accidentally on a duck, and along comes St. Peter, who doesn't miss a thing, and with him is another extremely ugly woman. He chains them together with the same admonishment as for the first guy.

The third guy has observed all this and not wanting to be chained for all eternity to an ugly woman, is very, VERY careful where he steps. He manages to go months without stepping on any ducks, but one day St. Peter comes up to him with the most gorgeous woman he has ever laid eyes on: a very tall, tan, curvaceous, sexy blond. St. Peter chains them together without saying a word.

The guy remarks, "I wonder what I did to deserve being chained to you for all of eternity?"

She says, "I don't know about you, but I stepped on a duck!"

[roar-k]

What kind are they. I have only had ducks when I was a kid. My parents had two females. I asked my grandpa about it, and he said there is only one type of duck you want in your yard, a runner. Runners are leaner and like to....well...run. They will spend most of their time scouring the yard for bugs to eat. Our garden loved them. They will eat bugs even when being chased . Other ducks tend to be more liberal and sit around and poop in one place and wait for food handouts. If you don't have runners, eat them and go buy runners to replace them. Then, both you and your wife are happy .

I know the kind you speak of. They do not quack all that often, they do not fly, but they run around and lay their eggs wherever they are running. They are supposed to lay a large amount of eggs, or so I think.

EDIT: It's only the females that quack apparently.

[Ken]

Nell warned me...........

The ducks are about 4 times as large as when we got them, a little over a week ago. They eat non-stop, splash water all over, and crap like nothing I've ever seen. Give 'em food and fresh water, and they eat like pigs while they jump in the water and crap in it and then drink it. Gross.

They're getting their own wading pool until the "duck yard" is done.

And their numbers are about to grow. My honey's friend also surprised her husband with 3 baby ducks the same time we got ours. Two of 'em got eaten by something, and the one that's left is "lonely." I've been told that we'll be getting that one, too.

Of course, NOTHING will eat our ducks. We have indoor ducks - at least 'till they get a bit bigger and move into their new high-security tunnel-proof outdoor digs. The damn things have taken over our screen deck. They live there in a jumbo sized dog cage, complete with a mini-wading pool. The cats just love watching them.

[BLEUXDOG]

What are you going to name the last one?

Caboose

[Ken]

What are you going to name the last one?

Caboose

Not a bad idea.........

[2dumb2kwit]

What are you going to name the last one?

Caboose

Justin! LOL

[finallyME]

All you got to do is "accidentally" leave the cage door open. Let them play with your cats.

[BENESSE]

All you got to do is "accidentally" leave the cage door open. Let them play with your cats.

Now that's not being nice fM, is it?