The borrowing mentality and me being a jerk

[Mountaintrekker]

So, a new situation has arrisen for us the past 2 years here in Alaska and I'm pretty PO'd about it. We have many friends and aquaintences and some are liberal and some are conservative. That being said, one thing is becoming abundantly clear... mostly from our liberal friends, but also from some of the others. They ask to borrow everything! "Do you own a chainsaw?" "Can I borrow it?" "Do you have a snow shovel, gas can, this wrench, that com-a-long, how about a shotgun so I can go duck hunting?" This is not a cup of sugar we are talking about here, but gear worth hundreds and thousands of dollars.
Are these people for real? Get your own stuff! I have no problem helping someone out, but good grief! I have lent out some things and now it's like pulling teeth to get them back and the people want to borrow more stuff! No more! Then I'm made to feel like a jerk for asking for my stuff back. I'm pulling my hair out with the "you have one, so we all can use it to our hearts content" mentality. What gives? Is this a combination California liberal thing and a backwoods "clanish" kind of thing? We have plenty of both in this area. I don't understand how my hard earned money that goes for necessary tools for wilderness living is a free for all for dumbasses who don't plan ahead. Give and inch and they take a mile at least.
I figured I'd vent and warn my fellow board members about this. Your area may be different, but be cautious. If this is how people are in this area when times are still good as in stores are still open and the gas pumps work, imagine how they are going to be when the poop hits the fan with a disaster etc. Pretty scary! Don't tell folks what you have. Everytime I have a conversation with people around here I can't be relaxed with my guard down. They try and trick you into saying what you have so they can borrow it. I may sound like I'm exaggerating, but I assure you I'm not. It's tiring and frustrating and making me not want to deal with people in general.
I'm putting a halt on this right now and we are moving again for the summer, so I guess I'll be coming off as a bit of a jerk who doesn't lend his stuff out at our next destination. Unless it's a life and death situation of course. I'm not a complete animal after all!
So, just use caution with who knows what about your capabilities and preps. I didn't think I needed to do this as much up here, but it appears to be the opposite.
Oh, I can also assure you I'm really not this crotchedy(sp?)! I know my last few posts have been me venting and complaining... I'm working on that. Thanks for letting me vent some steam, contrary to a few, this site is very helpful.

[Justin Case]

Sooooo,, Why do you loan stuff out ??

[gryffynklm]

Ya, I understand being in that situation. No not a jerk, although you may appear to be one to someone who won't see things from your position.

[crashdive123]

Vent away - that's what friends are for.


Got a chainsaw I can borrow?

[Ken]

An acquaintance of mine had a small flood in his basement. Called me and asked to borrow my shop vac. Sure.

Three weeks later, I needed it back. Called him, and he said he'd drop it off. Nothing. I used my broom.

Couple of months later I'm driving by his house and he's out in the yard. I stopped. Hey, can I get my shop vac back? Sure.

He goes in the house and comes back out with it and puts it in the back of my truck. When I get home, I find the thing's half full of water, smelled like hell, and the filter (the one that's supposed to be removed when sucking up water) is destroyed.

I say nothing. I clean it up, air it out, and replace the filter. Good to go.

About a year later, he calls AGAIN to borrow the shop vac. THAT'S when he heard it.

[Mountaintrekker]

I have a chainsaw you can borrow... It's running with a full tank of gas and it's in my hands... try and take it from me grasshopper!

[crashdive123]

I have a chainsaw you can borrow... It's running with a full tank of gas and it's in my hands... try and take it from me grasshopper!

[Justin Case]

I say nothing. I clean it up, air it out, and replace the filter. Good to go.

What kind of a Lawyer are you ? You should have sued him !

[Sourdough]

I like it when they borrow it and, then they "LOAN" it to someone else, and then he moves. I loan tools to a friend who's wife has always loathed me, Well he died, guess what. Around here they borrow, and never return. What really galls me is if I loan high quality Jumper Cables, and they disappear, and I have to use cheap, crappy, short, skanky jumper cables. GRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrr

[Ken]

What kind of a Lawyer are you ? You should have sued him !

Dope. I should waste 10 billable hours to recover $100.00?

[RangerXanatos]

One that has happened to me.

I have kept all of the textbooks I have ever went out and bought. The ones I borrow, I always give them back as promptly as I can... A friend asked to borrow some textbooks so he wouldn't have to buy them. Since I was done with them, I said sure. I lent them to him and now since he's done with those courses, I asked him about them and guess what? He GAVE them to someone else and he doesn't remember who. The nerve of such a thing.

[crashdive123]

Dope. I should waste 10 billable hours to recover $100.00?

Pain and suffering? Mental anguish? Sheesh - do we gotta tell you everything?

[Ken]

From now on, they leave collateral for anything more than a cup of sugar. Preferably something I need.

[Ken]

Pain and suffering? Mental anguish? Sheesh - do we gotta tell you everything?

Over a shop vac? This requires some research.........

[crashdive123]

Over a shop vac? This requires some research.........

There ya go. Research. More billable hours.

[Justin Case]

Dope. I should waste 10 billable hours to recover $100.00?

Its not like you got anything better do

[LowKey]

What really galls me is if I loan high quality Jumper Cables, and they disappear, and I have to use cheap, crappy, short, skanky jumper cables.

No no. You loan the short skanky set (keep the good set for yourself) and when they figure out all you have is junk they don't ask any more.

[canid]

firstly i am compelled to state that i m a firm believer in both borrowing and lending. we consume less, for example when each neighbor needn't own the same occasional use tool.

on the other hand, you have worked hard for the things you have, and have them because you have need for them. you aren't obligated to lend anything. if you don't feel comfortable letting somebody use something, you aren't being rude; you own the thing.

[BENESSE]

This was a huge thing in my family when I was growing up--learned the hard way.
You absolutely do not lend tools or anything mechanical or electrical. Give it away before you lend it away.
Same with us now, although in NYC no one asks. And we would rather spend the money or do without before we asked anyone for anything.

We do however have some spare/lesser quality tools that in a pinch we could "lend" but would never expect to get back.

[Justin Case]

I Loaned a guy My ex wife one time and the dirty SOB brought her back