Midwives ??

**nell67** · 01-18-2008, 05:09 PM

Originally Posted by trax

ahem...as opposed to the BIG pygmies down in New Guinea? or did the Big pygmies all elect to stay in Old Guinea?

LOL! somebody doesnt know Larry the cable guy?

**Rick** · 01-18-2008, 05:10 PM

A hunter walks into a glade in a forest and there's a very small pygmie standing beside an enormous dead elephant.
"Hello!" said the pygmie, "look what I've just killed".
"Good grief", said the hunter, "what did you kill it with?"
"My club" said the pygmie.
The hunter, astonished, gasped "How big's your club?"
"Oh, there's about 60 of us" replied the pygmie.

**trax** · 01-18-2008, 05:12 PM

I hope they didn't take the name the "wolf pack" I don't wanna mess with those guys.

Larry the cable guy? I saw his picture on the front of a dvd case once, that was enough, didn't exactly encourage me to make the purchase. If I ever have to remember why I don't bother watching tv, remind me about Larry the cable guy.

**nell67** · 01-18-2008, 05:13 PM

But He Is Hilarious!!!!!!

**Rick** · 01-18-2008, 05:14 PM

And the highest paid comedian for three years running.

**trax** · 01-18-2008, 05:16 PM

Originally Posted by Rick

And the highest paid comedian for three years running.

which may address some small part of why I'm more than willing to turn my back on "society" as we know it.

**trax** · 01-18-2008, 06:45 PM

My apologies to the author for having totally hijacked this thread. Midwifery is an ancient and honored tradition and a set of skills that anyone choosing to live off of the grid would be well-advised to learn (myself included)

**Walkman** · 01-18-2008, 07:25 PM

So...

As the father of 5 (soon to be 6-yea you are reading that right), I've had a bit of experience with this. In fact, my 3rd child was born at home, without Doc or Midwife.

The story on that: My went into labor with very uneven contractions. Since they were not evenly timed, we both thought they were false labor, so we just hung out. After about an hour, they started to increase in strength, so I called the hospital, and took the other 2 kids down the street to the babysitters. When I got back, instead of my wife being ready to get into the car, she was on our bed and telling me "we don't have time to get there". I started to call 911, to which she said "you don't have time for that either". I got to "deliver" my son about 3 minutes later. By deliver, I mean I caught him and handed him to mom. She did all the "delivering", as far as I'm concerned.

For all the births, the biggest ting I did was help my wife relax and hold on to her hand. She's a strong woman.

**nell67** · 01-18-2008, 07:45 PM

Originally Posted by trax

My apologies to the author for having totally hijacked this thread. Midwifery is an ancient and honored tradition and a set of skills that anyone choosing to live off of the grid would be well-advised to learn (myself included)

So true Trax,while I havent trained as a midwife,I have taken the red cross training,so it wouldn't bother me to have to deliver a baby if I needed to.

**nell67** · 01-18-2008, 07:49 PM

Originally Posted by Walkman

So...

As the father of 5 (soon to be 6-yea you are reading that right), I've had a bit of experience with this. In fact, my 3rd child was born at home, without Doc or Midwife.

The story on that: My went into labor with very uneven contractions. Since they were not evenly timed, we both thought they were false labor, so we just hung out. After about an hour, they started to increase in strength, so I called the hospital, and took the other 2 kids down the street to the babysitters. When I got back, instead of my wife being ready to get into the car, she was on our bed and telling me "we don't have time to get there". I started to call 911, to which she said "you don't have time for that either". I got to "deliver" my son about 3 minutes later. By deliver, I mean I caught him and handed him to mom. She did all the "delivering", as far as I'm concerned.

For all the births, the biggest ting I did was help my wife relax and hold on to her hand. She's a strong woman.

Way to go Walkman,my mom didnt make it to the hospital when she had me,my grandmother delivered me,that is how I got my name.

**Smok** · 01-18-2008, 11:53 PM

Hay I was having fun reading Trax no need to apologies if we go back on topic thats OK if not that OK too.. But it is something to thank about I just got a book on Midwifing going to read up some just in case

**ditchmedic** · 01-19-2008, 11:24 AM

Being on the recieving end of childbirth is easy, some basic equipment you will need are: bulb syringe for sucking all that "gunk" out of his/her nose and mouth after delivery, 2 clamps of some sort but you can also use cloth strips tied around the cord, you would tie off the cord approx 6-8 inches away from baby leaving approx 1 inch between the ties, a sharp clean knife to cut the cord, and a blanket to warm the baby when it is delivered. This is all assuming a normal presentation of head first...not feet arm butt, those are all emergency births and need extensive training. So mom does all the work, you catch the baby (don't drop him) suction the nose and mouth, cut the cord, warm baby and dry off, drying off baby will usually trigger breathing. If mom is going to breastfeed, which i would recommend especially far from civilization, start trying to feed baby, this will also cause the placenta to deliver, do not pull on placenta, let it come out on its own. If you are going to be going to hospital keep placenta, they want to look at it. if not throw it away, unless your really hungry

, massage the uterus to stop mom's bleeding. Sew up any tears down there if able. Thats about it.

**nell67** · 01-19-2008, 11:28 AM

Originally Posted by ditchmedic

Being on the recieving end of childbirth is easy, some basic equipment you will need are: bulb syringe for sucking all that "gunk" out of his/her nose and mouth after delivery, 2 clamps of some sort but you can also use cloth strips tied around the cord, you would tie off the cord approx 6-8 inches away from baby leaving approx 1 inch between the ties, a sharp clean knife to cut the cord, and a blanket to warm the baby when it is delivered. This is all assuming a normal presentation of head first...not feet arm butt, those are all emergency births and need extensive training. So mom does all the work, you catch the baby (don't drop him) suction the nose and mouth, cut the cord, warm baby and dry off, drying off baby will usually trigger breathing. If mom is going to breastfeed, which i would recommend especially far from civilization, start trying to feed baby, this will also cause the placenta to deliver, do not pull on placenta, let it come out on its own. If you are going to be going to hospital keep placenta, they want to look at it. if not throw it away, unless your really hungry

, massage the uterus to stop mom's bleeding. Sew up any tears down there if able. Thats about it.

this is an awesome post ditchmedis,thank you!