A while ago I decided to have a couple of the neighbors homemade bratwurst I grilled earlier in the evening. Pulled out the usual condiments, but couldn't help but notice the upside down Heinz ketchup bottle. (Living in a house like mine, with all manner of young 'uns coming and going, damn near anything can show up.) I would never buy such an item, I've already noticed it has fewer ounces, plus, it just seems so urban metrosexual, or something equally goofy.
Well, the label promised "no waiting". My life is now complete. I can't tell you all how frustrating it has been, waiting for the MoFo ketchup to work it's way down the neck of the bottle, year after endless year.
But, wasn't Heinz the ketchup that was too thick to win a race (or maybe that was John Kerry), long ago and once upon a time? Now it just makes a hell of a mess if you don't close the cap properly.
