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Thread: Surviving a divorce

  1. #1
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    Default Surviving a divorce

    Gotta be on of the most mentally and physically draining experiences I've ever been through.
    Now I'm going through it again.
    This aint no kinda fun.
    I certainly wish it were over already, but I just cant afford the lawyer right now to get the ball rolling.


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    Senior Member wareagle69's Avatar
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    guess i was one of the lucky ones, i left in may was divoreced by mid oct.
    we had a deal if it did not work out i got my tools, truck and trailer, and 5,000 in cash. she got the rest good and bad,
    plus i think i pizzed her off so much she just didn't want my name anymore
    two sox ran into her 4 or 5 years later and she still was hopping mad, oh well. thats the cowboy life she knew just didn't want to beleive it.
    for me i try not to hold onto anything so much that it would cause much grief if i was to go thru it again
    i have what i call my 4 t's in life
    tools,truck,trailer,trade--that coupled with a modest savings and i can bug out at anytime should she decide its over, hopefully it doesn't happen with this one
    always be prepared-prepare all ways
    http://wareaglesurvival.blogspot.com

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    Senior Member nell67's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wooly View Post
    Gotta be on of the most mentally and physically draining experiences I've ever been through.
    Now I'm going through it again.
    This aint no kinda fun.
    I certainly wish it were over already, but I just cant afford the lawyer right now to get the ball rolling.
    Good luck wooly,and if you both agree it's over,and who gets what,then just go to the courthouse and file through there,no lawyer needed,but both of you must be in complete agreement o every aspect of who gets what,my sister outlaw did this a couple of years ago,and it cost her $35 to file,but I think inIndiana at least they have raised the costs.
    Soular powered by the son.

    Nell, MLT (ASCP)

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    Junior Member ieatcrayons's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wooly View Post
    Gotta be on of the most mentally and physically draining experiences I've ever been through.
    Now I'm going through it again.
    This aint no kinda fun.
    I certainly wish it were over already, but I just cant afford the lawyer right now to get the ball rolling.
    i have only had to do it once.. an yes.. the most draining experience!! i sometimes really feel for the girlfriend i have now.. it is not a pretty place where i stand on the subject of marriage. so i would say it gets better.. i don't like to lie. so its just something you have to get through. good luck brother.
    I bring nothing to the table

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    Senior Member Winnie's Avatar
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    Hope you can get through this one, don't despair, I'm sure you'll be OK eventually.
    Recession; A period when you go without something your Grandparents never heard of.

  6. #6
    Lone Wolf COWBOYSURVIVAL's Avatar
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    Divorce to me is a peice of cake if it is just material things it ain't worth fightin' over. Now child custody is a whole nother ball of wax. Try going after custody of a 1 year old little girl and being her Father in the heart of the South....Took about 10 years off of my life but my little girl is home with Daddy and safe! She is 6 now and I wouldn't change a thing!
    Keep in mind the problem may be extremely complicated, though the "Fix" is often simple...

    "Teaching a child to fish is the "original" introduction to all that is wild." CS

    "How can you tell a story that has no end?" Doc Carlson

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    My only divorce was kind of easy. No kids just dogs.

    I grabbed my dog, threw the guns and bow in the Jeep, put my dog in the passenger seat and drove off. Let her have everything..........

    Now we almost battled over the dog, but my name was on the papers so....tough.

    Can't imagine getting a divorce with kids................I don't even like going out of town as I tuck'm in at night and read them books. LOL. I told my current wife if she wanted to divorce me, I'd put the tipi up in the backyard and live there. Hell, she and the kids are going to get all my money anyway.

    I hinted that I bet I could throw a hell of a tipi party.LOL.

  8. #8
    Senior Member doug1980's Avatar
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    My divorce was fairly easy also. We had nothing of real value but we did have our son. Of course my ex provided a list of things she wanted and you know what, our son was not on there. So the judge gave me everything. Now custody is another story...I still have to deal with that......well I'll call her woman..... for at least another 8 years.
    Alaska to Florida, for how long, who knows...

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    Super Moderator crashdive123's Avatar
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    Good luck Wooly.
    Can't Means Won't

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    Gadget Master oldsoldier's Avatar
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    Wooly sorry to hear about your divorce. I can tell you from experience X2 that it can be a terrible experience. My first divorce in 1989, was ??? I got it all she was cheating on me while i was deployed. Plus almost bankrupted me/us die to drugs and bad checks. the local DA ( a family friend) told her that if she paid off ALL the bad checks didn't contest our divorce and leave the state he wouldn't prosecute her for fraud and drug charges. She did, she didn't , she got the f#%% outta Ky. My second was a little rough we had no problems i knew of until she said she didn't love me or want me anymore ( two days before christmas) I did like FVR took my guns, dogs, truck and camper. Let her have everything else. that was in 1998. She lost house, car, etc. to not paying taxes in 2002. ( Karma???) But marrage #3 I found my soul mate and NOW know what it means to be truly happy. Just hang in there I guarentee it will get better.

  11. #11
    Senior Member SARKY's Avatar
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    Wooly, if it is mutual and you can decide how you want to split, go to leagalzoom.com and do it that way. if not,
    GOOD LUCK TO YOU
    I know what hunts you.

  12. #12
    Senior Member Aurelius95's Avatar
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    Driving home tonight, I heard the song, "It's Been Awhile" by Stained. It brought me right back to 2001 when I was going through my divorce. It's funny how a song can bring you back to where you thought you'd never go again.

    Good luck to you!
    Not all who wander are lost - Tolkien

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    Thanks for the encouraging words all. I spent the day with family and finally got to get alot off my chest along with doing lots of research online on how to attack it this time around.
    Now if only I could get these "poke in the eye" phone calls 2 X's a day to stop from her maybe I could find some peace of mind.
    We do have a son together....or so I think, as she was 2 weeks preggo before our wedding day but never told me. Funny though when you get to know someone over time and bring up doubt... you can hear it in their voice when they are lieing to you. Kind of an instinctive lie detector when they kick up the treble to that next level.
    The threatening e-mails from her ex BF don't help her cause none even when trying to pin it on her own mother. still don't know where they are coming from for sure but i save them all.

    Stupid as it may sound....I'm getting tired of playing detective and being nasty to her. Counceling was one of the things she orriginally wanted to try but when I finally agreed it was off the table. Go figure.
    Lately it's really become more of a who can screw who harder and it's getting real old, real quick. If this is a game...I don't wanna play no more and I will take my ball and go home.
    I'm no angel in this mess I've gotten myself into and will openly confess my flaws to anyone willing to not pass judgement including her. I guess that's the part I'm failing to understand the most.

  14. #14
    Quality Control Director Ken's Avatar
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    Wooly, I've been through a divorce myself and have represented over 1,500 divorce clients in the last 25 years. If you have any general questions (not specific to the law of your state) just PM me.
    “Learning is not compulsory. Neither is survival.”
    W. Edwards Deming

    "Live free or die: Death is not the worst of evils."
    General John Stark

  15. #15
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    Hang in there, you'll get past this and move on. Though, I dare say, try to make it civil if possible, there is no point in making it last longer than it needs to. Good luck.

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    I realize divorce is rough but just imagine if there were no choices in life and you had to stay with her . Now that would suck! All wounds heal with time, Brother. Chin up and stay safe.

  17. #17

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    Hang in there Wooly!

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    Senior Member bulrush's Avatar
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    Sorry about your divorce Wooly. I went through it too. Just make sure you get all the assets are are entitled to, and don't do the Do It Yourself divorce under any circumstances. Get a lawyer, get a loan for the lawyer fees if you have to.

    I bought the DIYD book, then got a lawyer. I compared the 2 Divorce Agreements and the DIYD book left many important details out. Believe me, paying for a lawyer the first time was much cheaper than changing a divorce agreement after the fact, and fighting it out in court.

    "Marriage is the leading cause of divorce."

  19. #19

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    Hang in there Wooly. I did the DIY divorce and it worked out good. No kids and no real property to bicker over though, and my ex and I were civil about it all.

    Hopefully the two of you can be peacable enough not to allow the courts and lawyers get all the cash.

  20. #20

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    My condolences to ya, but advice on marriage, as it is on love...It's for the birds!

    But what do I know? I'm bitter towards things like that.
    There is a pleasure in the pathless woods. There is a rapture on the lonely shore.There is society, where none intrudes, By the deep sea, and music in its roar. I love not man the less, but Nature more... Lord Byron

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