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Thread: Emergency! Emergency!

  1. #1
    Senior Member kyratshooter's Avatar
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    Default Emergency! Emergency!

    An extreme emergency of the first magnitude occurred at the Krat house today. No more serious SHTF incident will ever occur and immediate measures had to be taken.

    At about 5pm the Krat walked to the kitchen counter, pressed the button on the coffee maker, walked away and waited the necessary 5 minutes returned to get my coffee and, HORRORS!!!, nothing happened!

    The pot was empty and cold!

    I checked the plug, checked the switch, looked at the little red light as it set there staring at me with its blank red stare.

    Hamilton Beech had rolled over and died.

    Now the Krat will avoid a trip to town with extreme and excessive evasion. I will bake my own bread to avoid going to the grocery. I will take cold showers for two days to save a trip to the Home Depot for a new hot water heater. I have been known to tape up a cut with duct tape to skip the 20 mile run to the ER.

    But when I realized the Hamilton Beech was dead I immediately unplugged it, dumped the water from it into the sink and slam dunked the dead unit into the wheelie bin as I walked to the car for the trip to Walmart for an immediate replacement!

    As I went through the checkout I explained the situation to the young lady working the register. She looked at me flat dead serious and replied "My Mom came down here at 1am in her house coat and flip flops the other night when hers broke. I was so embarrassed I could have died!"

    At least I had clothes on.
    Last edited by kyratshooter; 04-21-2017 at 08:17 PM.
    Come to the dark side, we have pudding.


  2. #2
    Senior Member alaskabushman's Avatar
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    I'm rather surprised you didn't just brew a pot anyway with a sock and a zip-tie...
    There ain't too many problems you can't fix with $500 or a 30-06.

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  3. #3

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    ^ hah! This!

    You don't keep a stovetop perker for such emergencies???
    Coffee first. Then the trip to Wally's.
    If we are to have another contest in…our national existence I predict that the dividing line will not be Mason and Dixon's, but between patriotism & intelligence on the one side, and superstition, ambition & ignorance on the other…
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    Ed edr730's Avatar
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    I put hot water from the wood stove on my coffee and pour through a collander. Much faster than a coffee maker and much cleaner than a french press. I dread when spring comes and I have to use the coffee maker. All that work setting up the coffee maker and walking all the way to the kitchen.

  5. #5
    Senior Member hunter63's Avatar
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    That surprises me as well.....But I can relate....LOL The horror!

    There is always an enameled coffee pot around somewhere to "boil me up a batch"....
    But, Yeah I know,.... that would mean digging around in one of the rondy trailers....looking for it...with out coffee.

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    Last edited by hunter63; 04-21-2017 at 10:06 PM.
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    Senior Member kyratshooter's Avatar
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    Oh yes I have the 32 cup pot and two or three one quart pots along with the Moors pot I keep in the kitchen but the coffee maker is for wake up coffee.

    you do not want me messing with dangerous machinery, open flames or measuring coffee in the mornings. It is best if I simply push a button and wait for the machine to do the work when I wake up.

    The possibility that I might have to think about what I am doing when I wake up at the crack of noon was the big motivation factor.
    Come to the dark side, we have pudding.

  7. #7

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    reminds me , I was in a tower crane 200 ft in the air , went to make a pot of coffee . No coffee filters , I looked over the side a couple of times but I didn't jump , I remembered I had toilet paper , I used the TP as a filter . It was a ****ty cup of coffee !!!

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    Super Moderator crashdive123's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fjrmurph View Post
    reminds me , I was in a tower crane 200 ft in the air , went to make a pot of coffee . No coffee filters , I looked over the side a couple of times but I didn't jump , I remembered I had toilet paper , I used the TP as a filter . It was a ****ty cup of coffee !!!
    Well duh. You are supposed to use the FRESH toilet paper.
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    LOL too funny Crash. Caught me in mid-sip.
    <coffee running out nose now...
    If we are to have another contest in…our national existence I predict that the dividing line will not be Mason and Dixon's, but between patriotism & intelligence on the one side, and superstition, ambition & ignorance on the other…
    ~ President Ulysses S. Grant

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    Senior Member hunter63's Avatar
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    The count, 2 strikes 3 balls......and the pitch ...crack..... it going, going, Gooone..It's out of here...
    Man, could you see that coming ...or what?
    Geezer Squad....Charter Member #1
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    Senior Member kyratshooter's Avatar
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    OK now I am confused.

    If you use it in the coffee maker first do you let the TP dry before the next step. If not things are going to be a bit soggy.

    Is that where the term bog roll originated?
    Come to the dark side, we have pudding.

  12. #12
    Super Moderator crashdive123's Avatar
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    Alaska, The Madness! 1stimestar's Avatar
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    Lol I would totally go to Wal Mart in my housecoat for coffee.

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    Why do I live in Alaska? Because I can.

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    Super Moderator crashdive123's Avatar
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    Happens all the time around here.......but of course it isn't -50.
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    Senior Member Old GI's Avatar
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    krs: All of our sympathy and commiseration. A death of something so dear takes some recovery; I found returning from Walmart normally does it. But, we do keep spares.
    When Wealth is Lost, Nothing is Lost;
    When Health is Lost, Something is Lost;
    When Character is Lost, ALL IS LOST!!!!!!!

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  16. #16
    Senior Member Solar Geek's Avatar
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    We have 5 types of coffee pots so this never happens to us. My deepest sympathies for the experience, and great joy at your new favorite way to make coffee from Walmart.
    But as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD. Joshua 24:15

  17. #17
    Senior Member hunter63's Avatar
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    Seems many can relate.....

    We have stores around called "Big Lots".....kinda a higher end Dollar Store?.....
    Has appliances, sofas garde stuff, canned food, that oddest selection of flavored chips you have ever seen....

    Supposedly all stuff on clearance.... That where I get my 8 flashlights for $10 bucks kind of stuff.....

    From time to time the have coffee makers for $9.99....

    Few years back I bought 5 of them.....one for the house, one for the camper, one for "The Place"
    ....and a one for bringing to hotel rooms on hunting trips (made a cute carry case for it)....those little two cuppers won't make it with 4 hunters filling thermoses.
    ....and a spare.

    Anyway...they were only a on/off, no timer,bare bones 12cup coffee makers..... but the whole thing was cheaper that a new pot for a Mr.Coffee.

    You are supposed to dump out the grounds for year to year, I guess (OMG)...but a couple did get trashed from packing them up for a year or getting bounced around.....
    Right now I could go down to the shed...at "The Place...there is one in it's box, inside a plastic bag on on a shelf....spare.

    Also there is a percolator that we got as a wedding gift 49 years ago....still works...but some times you buy new stuff ...just because...?

    Everyone DRIBBLES so are used over the sink...
    The quest for a non-dribbler goes on....
    But we are prepared.

    I would rather have a coffee maker than more ammo in the prep department....because I don't need bullets first thing in the morning if some one messes with me before coffee......
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  18. #18

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    can't get much worse than that ,my deepest sympathies krat, i too have been there.
    hang in there brother.
    coyotes listen to them, like children of the night what music they make.

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    Super Moderator crashdive123's Avatar
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    Let's see..........at the house....A Keurig is our current go to coffee source, but also in the cabinet is a French press, small drip pot and one percolator. In the workshop is another percolator. In the truck are two more percolators. Two more percolators in the storage unit. Upon review, I may need to stock up on some more.
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    Administrator Rick's Avatar
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    The very good news is we live in a wondrous world. How easy it is to stop at Starbucks on the way to Walmart to pick up an unpronounceable cup of joe. You can pick up one of those 8 hour energy drinks while at Walmart then swing by one of the many fast food horrors to pick up another cup of coffee on the way home. You will need that much caffeine to get the packing tape off the new coffee maker.

    I do not understand how shoplifters can get away with merchandise when it takes me three days to tear into one of those plastic packages. They are even bullet proof. I know. I've tried.

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