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Thread: is it a good or bad idea to let my daughter visit her mom in jail?

  1. #1

    Default is it a good or bad idea to let my daughter visit her mom in jail?

    since there is an off topic section here I thought I might ask about this
    Last edited by 1924; 08-24-2015 at 01:48 PM.


  2. #2
    Woodsman Adventure Wolf's Avatar
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    Dude, I don't mean any offense what-so-ever, but you've been here for like a day and have two posts. Telling people that you have never communicated with this kind of information is a little too personal, and a little strange.

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    Senior Member kyratshooter's Avatar
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    To me that would depend on the jails regulations, conditions and environment, the location, the maturity level of your daughter, the attitude of your wife and if there is another family member to accompany her.

    It is also not a decision I would turn over to an internet forum, so I am right in there with Adventure Wolf on this one.

    I worked in various correctional facilities as a classroom instructor and counselor for nearly two decades and I would not give a concrete yes or no answer even if I knew the answers to all these questions.
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    Standing by your wife isn't the same as excusing or enabling her actions. I would say let your daughter visit.

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    Senior Member Wise Old Owl's Avatar
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    odd... that you ask that question on any forum. But yes it's family and maybe a "visit" which has hurdle's just to get in, might show your daughter never to get messed up in something, It's It's a deep thought for your wife as any visitation is a blessing, and shows some trust.

    I write this as I have been to the local prisons several times - servicing the alarm systems on the roof's as a young man and years later going back and advising on Pest Control for Bed Bugs in Prisons... so you have much to worry about. From my perspective - my job scares me never to do anything that may put my family in some jeopardy.

    I will write - I hope your family gets thru this as best as possible and just do your best.
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    Senior Member hunter63's Avatar
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    I guess I would have never thought about a question such as this.......being on a Wilderness Survival Forum.

    My thinking is you have already answered you own question by asking it here....What would be the harm?

    ...and Welcome to the forum.
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    Senior Member natertot's Avatar
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    I have two perspectives on this. One as a child visiting my father and step father when they were incarcerated (happened a lot) and one as a security officer that works hand in hand with LEO and court services.

    As a child, it was a little scary and intimidating. However, it did drive the point not to end up there. Depending on the location, they had family rooms which were set up like living rooms and I never saw any other inmates and it wasn't bad at all. Other times it was the phone through the glass like you see on TV. One time, it was a large room with several inmates visiting their families. That set up was the most intimidating cause some of those guys looked mean and there was no barrier. So the details on all this could make it a decision maker for you.

    Now from my professional standpoint the biggest concern is if there are male inmates present given that your daughter is 14. I hate to say it, but teenage girls and even young women will get inappropriate remarks and gestures from the male inmates. However, I do know that many times accommodations can be made for family visits to prevent this kinda thing if you make the arrangements in advance.

    Long story short, if you can make the visit private then go for it. Beyond that, stuff can happen but it may turn into a teachable moment for your girl. Especially since in a couple of years she will be driving and chances are will have interaction with LE. Lots of things to consider, but it is hard to give a concrete answer.

    Best to you and your family during these times.
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    Alaska, The Madness! 1stimestar's Avatar
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    With out having the information asked in the above questions, I would say yes. 14 is a difficult age and a girl needs her mom, if only for the occasional visit. 6 months is a long time to go without. Also encourage her to write her mom letters with actual pen and paper then mail them.
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    Administrator Rick's Avatar
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    You posted this one on at least 10 other forums. You obviously have way too much time on your hands.

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    Senior Member hunter63's Avatar
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    Hummmm. .....I see that.

    So what did everyone else say?
    Geezer Squad....Charter Member #1
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  11. #11

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    Try to find some family counseling man. You are in deeper than you think and really really don't need to seek advice on line on this.

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    Senior Member hunter63's Avatar
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    Seems that 6 months has come and gone....one post is from 12-24-2013..
    Seriously, can't you find another scam....or at least change a few words so it doesn't pop up on Google all over the place?

    http://www.city-data.com/forum/paren...er-mother.html

    When does the asking for money come.....?
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    Super Moderator crashdive123's Avatar
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    I think the more appropriate question would be.....

    Is it a good idea or a bad idea to log onto an internet forum where I know absolutely nobody and give intimate details about my personal life and ask for advice on how to raise my teenage daughter. Yep that is the appropriate question.


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    Senior Member kyratshooter's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rick View Post
    You posted this one on at least 10 other forums. You obviously have way too much time on your hands.
    Yep, this guy is all over the internet asking the exact question on every web site.

    He at least needs to update the query since the daughter is now 16 and his wife should have been out of the jail 18 months ago.

    So my new perspective on this is;

    Should a 16 year old girl and a woman who has already paid her debt to society be forced to live with an internet troll ???
    If you didn't bring jerky what did I just eat?

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    Quote Originally Posted by kyratshooter View Post
    Yep, this guy is all over the internet asking the exact question on every web site.

    He at least needs to update the query since the daughter is now 16 and his wife should have been out of the jail 18 months ago.

    So my new perspective on this is;

    Should a 16 year old girl and a woman who has already paid her debt to society be forced to live with an internet troll ???
    It could have been much worse. You guys should at least be grateful he did not ask, "What is the best knife for survival?" or "What do I put in my bug out bag?" or "Where can I go to find free land and live off the grid?"

    S.M.
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    Senior Member hunter63's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FishingLena View Post
    If she wants to...
    Hunter63 saying Hey and Welcome......There is a intro section at:

    http://www.wilderness-survival.net/f...-Introductions

    And.........."If who wants to"....what?
    Geezer Squad....Charter Member #1
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  17. #17
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    Send her a hacksaw in some ground meat and tell them to meet each other in the wilderness... then head for Canada... snark.

    EDIT: OOPS that may just land y'all in jail and it may not be the same one for a happy family reunion...
    Last edited by TXyakr; 08-26-2015 at 02:58 PM. Reason: second thoughts...

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