Wondering if you figured the bowdrill out
I'm not an expert by any means. In fact, I have a ton to learn but I do know that the right wood is so important for beginners. The link that was posted earlier is to a good friend of mine's website and I can vouch for what he says. I know they've done extensive testing of woods and practicing firestarting.
When I first started trying to get a coal, I had similar problems until I found the right woods to use and to really lock my holding hand against my leg. Plus remembering not to go crazy and to take deep breaths. Everyone's ability is different. My partner, Mark is super strong, so he can get coals quick while I have to use a different technique.
The other thing that helps me when I am getting the shiny rubbed smooth affect is to roughen up the spindle so that you can get more dust. I hope you update us on how your fire starting went.