Fatherhood...

[DOGMAN]

"I wish you love And happiness
I guess I wish you All the best
I wish you don't Do like I do
And ever fall in love with someone like you-
Cause if you feel, Just like I did
You'd probably walk around the block like a little kid.
But kids don't know They can only guess
How hard it is To wish you happiness" John Prine from ALL the Best


Well, as many of you know, I am about to become a Dad! My wife is expecting any day now, the doctor says it could be today, tomorrow, or anytime this week! So, my mind is full of anticipation, worries, and excitement.

Anyway, one theme that keeps reoccuring in my mind is that I want to be the best father I can be to our soon-to-be born son. I want to try to set my son up to lead a happy and successful life, and to create a childhood for him that will empower him for the journey into adulthood, not hinder him or hold him back.

I want to instill in him a joy for learning, hard work, wild places, animals, music and art, honesty, intergrity etc... I want him to believe in himself, and not be afraid of change, or the unknown. And, I want him to treat all other people with respect and see their worth no matter there circumstance.

However, these are not easy things to do. So many of us end up as adults- embittered, disenfranchised, fractured, afraid, damaged, dysfunctional and lacking in any joy or appreciation for life, love, nature or the world at large.
Ultimatly, all I want to give my son, is the skills that will allow him to find happiness and love throughout his life. But, this is no easy task.

Any suggestions or advice you all can offer will be apprecitated.

[nell67]

Jason,congrats and good luck with the new one when he arrives.

Oh yea,and if you can homeschool him,don't send him to public school.it can ruin a good kid quick.

[Riverrat]

Congraulations, it is one of the true joys of life, to be a dad. Best advice I can give...be there for them, let them learn at thier pace, and show them lots of love.

[jrock24]

Congrats and good luck. I just took my 5 y/o son up to a little creek and he was jumping in and out chasing tadpoles, great times.

[Dennis K.]

Be there. not in words, like "hey, i'm here for you."
I mean really physically be there. take off work for his birthday. Pull him out of class for a day, just because you want to. Make things with him - put the tools in his hand. Laugh with him at his mistakes, because you made 'em too. Say "yes" often. Laugh out loud. Let him see you work and play, and let him do it all with you.

There ain't nothin better than being a Daddy

[nell67]

anyone can be a father,but it takes a special kind of man to be a Dad.

[erunkiswldrnssurvival]

anyone can be a father,but it takes a special kind of man to be a Dad.

That is so true, My children are my only inheritance, they inspire me to always try to do more for them next time, because ultimatly teaching our kids how to survive for thier future is what we work for.

[Gray Wolf]

anyone can be a father,but it takes a special kind of man to be a Dad.

So true nell!

Jason it's a job I highly recommend... actually it's not a job, it's an enjoyment, I still highly recommend it. ;)

[klkak]

Love and support your child regardless of the decision or mistakes they make. Be an excellent example to him. Instill in his heart the fruits of the spirit "Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self-control". Help him to not become conceited, provoking and envious.

[erunkiswldrnssurvival]

THE wisdom of an elder bear...thank you KlKaK

[klkak]

Actually it's the wisdom of the Apostle Paul that he wrote in his letter to the Christian Churches in the Roman Province of Galatia. (Galatians 5:22). But religion is not talked about in this area of the forums Thats why I didn't include this in the previous post. But wisdom it is.

[erunkiswldrnssurvival]

THANKS for pointing out. acknowedge wood lore,that path leads to a unified determination,A struggle for survival that promotes continual advancement is the path of creation.

[klkak]

acknowedge wood lore,that path leads to a unified determination,A struggle for survival that promotes continual advancement is the path of creation.

Um OK, can someone please translate this into a sentence that I can understand.:confused:

[crashdive123]

Jason - from what I have learned about you since coming to the forum.....you will do just fine.

[erunkiswldrnssurvival]

Um OK, can someone please translate this into a sentence that I can understand.:confused:
WE SEEK TO IMPROVE EVERY ASPECT of how we live to the point of having no worry for how we might survive. practice is our nature and improvement
allows us more comforts.The question is simple,if you prepair you prosper.

[klkak]

OK, thats better.

[Ole WV Coot]

Congrats also and very sound advice. No advice from me they said it all.

[ryaninmichigan]

Things I have tried to teach

Give people respect until they give you a reason not to.
Stand up for what you believe in. Right or wrong pick a side.
Have faith ask god for help
Take responsibility
Be nice to people
Sometimes it is ok to be mean.
Say I’m sorry.
Work hard
Take time to play

[RangerXanatos]

Love and support your child regardless of the decision or mistakes they make. Be an excellent example to him. Instill in his heart the fruits of the spirit "Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self-control". Help him to not become conceited, provoking and envious.

I think klkak has the best answer. Be an example of a real man that can do all of these things for him to follow.

Daniel

[Rick]

I hope your wife and baby are healthy and everything comes out okay (no pun intended there). You'll do well. Your kids will remember the time you spend with them long after they have forgotten the toy you bought.

[Sarge47]

Nell's answer regarding Home-school is right on the money! Children, like the rest of us, become products of their social environment. Their peer-group forms the kind of person that they become. Let that peer-group be that child's parents. My 2nd son was raised this way & the difference between him & the people his age around him is astounding! Oh, & keep him away from Rick's "Twinkie" suit.:eek::rolleyes::D:cool:

[Rick]

Hey, I was edumacated in publik scool. Nuthin rong with mee.

[klkak]

My daughter was educated in the Department of Defence School (DODS) system. Almost like private school. My wife and I pay for our grandchildern to attend a private Christian school in Anchorage.

[Proud American]

My advice don't get discouraged if you feel you fall short, the fact tha you have all the best intentions means your on the right track. Raise him well rounded but firm in his beliefs also I don't know but in my age group the biggest thing I find lackin is moral and patriotic value. My favorite quote is

War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things. The decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feeling which thinks that nothing is worth war is much worse. The person who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which is more important than his own personal safety, is a miserable creature and has no chance of being free unless made and kept so by the exertions of better men than himself.
--John Stewart Mill--

Interpet it how you like but make him or her have purpose in life and you will do just fine.

Raise him patriotic raise him a Proud American (All the world should be more patriotic, exept for some exceptions:rolleyes:)

[ryaninmichigan]

Nell's answer regarding Home-school is right on the money! Children, like the rest of us, become products of their social environment. Their peer-group forms the kind of person that they become. Let that peer-group be that child's parents. My 2nd son was raised this way & the difference between him & the people his age around him is astounding! Oh, & keep him away from Rick's "Twinkie" suit.:eek::rolleyes::D:cool:

From the education value I agree. But do you think there is no value in the social interaction? I see value in this. I think home schooling lacks in social development. They only know you and yours. Not unlike my opinion of most only children. They did not learn there is a pecking order. I want my kids to have some time to see what other people are like and how to deal with them. I won’t pull this off topic about it. I will start another thread.

[Aurelius95]

My son turns 8 next month. Even though his mom and I divorced when he was 2, I see him several times a week (including multiple nights at my house). I don't have a lot of money, but I've got time. That's what he wants from me. This weekend, we are going on a camping trip to NW Georgia with some fathers/sons from his school. Should be a great time.

One great thing you can do for your son is to love your wife, his mom, no matter what. That will also teach him to respect her too.

I'm sure you will do a great job.

[LostOutrider]

Nell's answer regarding Home-school is right on the money! Children, like the rest of us, become products of their social environment. Their peer-group forms the kind of person that they become. Let that peer-group be that child's parents. My 2nd son was raised this way & the difference between him & the people his age around him is astounding! Oh, & keep him away from Rick's "Twinkie" suit.:eek::rolleyes::D:cool:


Have to disagree with two folks I like a whole lot here. The schools aren't the problem. Schools become the problem when parents believe their job begins and ends at the front door of the school.

Be intricately involved with any group that spends any amount of time with your child: childcare, preschool, school, Scouts, churches, Little League . . . anything. It is fine that they learn from other adults and other situations, but remember always your role as the primary source. Let them bond with coaches and teachers and ministers and scoutmasters, but always be there as well.

[nell67]

Have to disagree with two folks I like a whole lot here. The schools aren't the problem. Schools become the problem when parents believe their job begins and ends at the front door of the school.

Be intricately involved with any group that spends any amount of time with your child: childcare, preschool, school, Scouts, churches, Little League . . . anything. It is fine that they learn from other adults and other situations, but remember always your role as the primary source. Let them bond with coaches and teachers and ministers and scoutmasters, but always be there as well.
Obviously you haven't been in every school there is,I have been involved in everything my kids have done, even sat in class to "control" my youngest because the teachers couldn't teach the class,they push you and push you to put them on meds now because they want little zombie kids in their class rooms.He was the quietest kid I had until he went to school.

[Sarge47]

From the education value I agree. But do you think there is no value in the social interaction? I see value in this. I think home schooling lacks in social development. They only know you and yours. Not unlike my opinion of most only children. They did not learn there is a pecking order. I want my kids to have some time to see what other people are like and how to deal with them. I won’t pull this off topic about it. I will start another thread.
Sorry to disagree with you RiM, but my son never has lacked for "social development". The only difference is he doesn't buy into their BS! He comes out as a leader, not a follower. I don't believe that you have to subject a child to a bad situation to get them to "experience" something. They can do that on any level, but it's better if that level can be controlled. I find that now I have a granddaughter that is being home-schooled as well. Just for the record, & you might find this interesting, both my son & my Grand-daughter have been home schooled for the same reason...a bunch of B.S. on the part of the public school system! We also came to find out that my son's education was superior to that to which he would have gotten in public school. He's since gone to college & made the Dean's List!:cool:

[LostOutrider]

Obviously you haven't been in every school there is,

No ma'am, can't say I have. Then again, I don't know too many who can make that claim, either.

But, I do know my school. And I know my profession. Still, this is a thread celebrating being a new daddy and I don't want to derail it. I'd welcome a discussion over PM, though, where we could share some experiences.

[DOGMAN]

Just to focus the discussion, and to get back on task. We are planning to home school. In our area this a homeschool co-op, which has a book exchange, weekly social activities etc...

[Gray Wolf]

In our area this a homeschool co-op, which has a book exchange, weekly social activities etc...

Jason, could you please explain that more in detail. I have never heard of homeschool co-op before.

[DOGMAN]

Jason, could you please explain that more in detail. I have never heard of homeschool co-op before.

Sure, there are a couple of Nat'l Organizations that focus on "home schooling" and there are "support groups" in local areas that are affiliated with the organizations. These local groups host regularly scheduled events that are designed to allow kids to socialize and parents to exchange ideas on teaching, etc... Some groups have events twice a week even.

Here are a couple of links that will get you going
http://www.nhen.org/support/groups/browse.asp
http://www.americanhomeschoolassociation.org/

[Dennis K.]

Also, many local churches have homeschool groups as well. So, if you are a great teacher of biology, but grammar vexes you, you can frequently find other parents that can teach those topics - kind of a trade/barter system. Through these groups, you can also find music teachers, foreign language teachers, etc.

[Gray Wolf]

Do you get any taxes reimbursed? I know I paid a lot of school taxes (property tax) every year.

[DOGMAN]

Not in my area. In fact you still have to pay those taxes here, no matter if your kids are home schooled, got to private school or whatever. Heck, you have to pay them even if you don't have kids

[Dennis K.]

No. Even though homeschoolers do not directly benefit from their local public schools, the support of local school systems through property tax is considered a community project, just like roads, sewage, trash removal, etc.
Also, many homeschool kids are eligible for activities like all-state band, orchestra, or choir. Some homeschool groups use things like standardized tests and assessments or screening tools.
Paying for public education through your taxes is not like purchasing a service.

[nell67]

Got baby...yet??

[DOGMAN]

No, staying close to home....waiting, paitently waiting....any day now

[nell67]

Thats the hardest part. good luck:)

[crashdive123]

Caster Oil and Jumping Jacks.

[nell67]

Caster Oil and Jumping Jacks.

NO!! wrong on that,I let a doc talk me into that with my last one and he ended up with jaundice because he was too early,let nature take it's course on this one.

[DOGMAN]

thanks for thinking of us! We'll keep ya posted

[crashdive123]

I meant for him.

[DOGMAN]

I've been on a strict regimen of jumping jacks and caster oil for years

[nell67]

Ummm,well,he could end up being incompacitated at the wrong moment if he does that,LMAO!:D

[crashdive123]

I've been on a strict regimen of jumping jacks and caster oil for years

IMO - flap jacks and maple syrup are far superior.

[bulrush]

I find a dust mask works well for those nuclear, toxic diapers.

[trax]

Well, dang it all mr Jason Montana, another John Prine fan, I should have guessed. Only thing I can suggest teaching your child is to think for him or her self. That's way too rare these days.

"You know I could have me a million more friends
All I gotta change is my point of view"
--John Prine.

[nell67]

Hey jason?? Has the little one made his appearance yet???

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