PDA

View Full Version : outhouses



rebel
03-11-2008, 03:52 PM
Around here ( upper mid-west) most outhouses are two holers. Not one above the other... I can not imagine wanting to share the event with someone. Just makes you go nah.

Sourdough
03-11-2008, 04:30 PM
Around here ( upper mid-west) most outhouses are two holers. Not one above the other... I can not imagine wanting to share the event with someone. Just makes you go nah.

My father had 14 brothers and sisters. His father had 18 brothers and sisters.
Large family needs lots of holes, sometimes 4 or more.

I have a one'hole deluxe herter's model perfect super wasp'waist outhouse.

If a family of 20 has the stomach flu, baby you need a lot of holes....:eek:

wildWoman
03-11-2008, 04:44 PM
Ah let me tell you, when the urge hits after morning coffee, even if there's just two people competing for the seat on one hole, a two-seater starts looking pretty good :) The worst is when townies come to visit and take half an hour out there, feeling queasy on the styrofoam seat, imagining a bear already following the fumes coming off the throne :D

Aurelius95
03-11-2008, 05:04 PM
http://images.cdmazika.com/images/n3hslrkvrmluurs4ehs.bmp

Not sure why, but the thumbnail doesn't work- you need to click on it.

nell67
03-11-2008, 05:06 PM
http://images.cdmazika.com/images/n3hslrkvrmluurs4ehs.bmp

Not sure why, but the thumbnail doesn't work- you need to click on it.

Aurelius,I think you are on to something there,looks like it could be new voting booths??:D:eek:

Aurelius95
03-11-2008, 05:19 PM
Agreed, Nell!!
:)

rebel
03-11-2008, 06:00 PM
In Korea it was the four hole plank over barrels. No privacy. Just the way it was.

Rick
03-11-2008, 06:24 PM
My grandfather had a one holer. The kerosene lantern was about the only heat you could muster up in the winter and you were darned glad to have it. He always scolded me because I turned the flame up too high and would bring it back with the glass covered in soot. Hey, it was cold out there. I still have that lantern, too!

BraggSurvivor
03-11-2008, 06:42 PM
Since we are on a septic field and get a ton of visitors in the summertime I was worried about the "extra volume" being dumped into our system. I'm not concerned about the grey water usage (when showering) as it is held in an underground storage tank and used to water the flower beds and garden.

So a couple years back I dug a hole and built a beautifully decorated cedar outhouse for our guests to use. We are outside 90% of the time with guests anyways so nobody complained when we ask them to please use it. I purposely aimed the front door towards the mountain view, then built a half door so quests could gaze out while doing their business and still have privacy.

One morning my friend who's mother in law (68) was visiting us from the big city, was just sitting there enjoying the sounds and sights when a young black bear quietly hopped up on his back legs and put his front paws on the half door to see whats inside.

It was the loudest scream Ive ever heard. I jumped up out of bed half asleep, grabbed my shotgun from the corner, paused briefly to put on my rubber boots at the door, and went running towards the outhouse. When I got there my dogs were chasing the bear away so I checked to see if she was OK. I peered over the door to see her standing on the seat, hunched over clutching both breasts and sobbing uncontrolabley. I opened the door to console her, helped her down from the seat and began walking her towards the house when all of a sudden she stopped and realized this big fat shaved headed naked guy, holding a shotgun and wearing a pair of old rubber boots covered in cow crap was now touching her. Well, all the screaming started again (even worse this time) as she ran for her life back to the house. My buddy was rolling on the ground crying from laughter and my kids were all lined up in the window laughing too. His wife was standing on the back deck red face and mad as a hornet.

I'm sure it was a day we will all never forget. :D:D:D

(his wife and mother in law have never been back since)

wildWoman
03-11-2008, 06:51 PM
Oh man that's funny, Bragg!! Best outhouse story I've ever heard.
Jeez these toilet threads are fertile ground!

Ridge Wolf
03-11-2008, 06:53 PM
Since we are on a septic field and get a ton of visitors in the summertime I was worried about the "extra volume" being dumped into our system. I'm not concerned about the grey water usage (when showering) as it is held in an underground storage tank and used to water the flower beds and garden.

So a couple years back I dug a hole and built a beautifully decorated cedar outhouse for our guests to use. We are outside 90% of the time with guests anyways so nobody complained when we ask them to please use it. I purposely aimed the front door towards the mountain view, then built a half door so quests could gaze out while doing their business and still have privacy.

One morning my friend who's mother in law (68) was visiting us from the big city, was just sitting there enjoying the sounds and sights when a young black bear quietly hopped up on his back legs and put his front paws on the half door to see whats inside.

It was the loudest scream Ive ever heard. I jumped up out of bed half asleep, grabbed my shotgun from the corner, paused briefly to put on my rubber boots at the door, and went running towards the outhouse. When I got there my dogs were chasing the bear away so I checked to see if she was OK. I peered over the door to see her standing on the seat, hunched over clutching both breasts and sobbing uncontrolabley. I opened the door to console her, helped her down from the seat and began walking her towards the house when all of a sudden she stopped and realized this big fat shaved headed naked guy, holding a shotgun and wearing a pair of old rubber boots covered in cow crap was now touching her. Well, all the screaming started again (even worse this time) as she ran for her life back to the house. My buddy was rolling on the ground crying from laughter and my kids were all lined up in the window laughing too. His wife was standing on the back deck red face and mad as a hornet.

I'm sure it was a day we will all never forget. :D:D:D

(his wife and mother in law have never been back since)

:D Guess she was done with her 'business' and quickly.. huh.:D

Rick
03-11-2008, 06:54 PM
Stuff Hollywood dreams up could never match real life. What a great story, Bragg!

crashdive123
03-11-2008, 06:56 PM
Bragg. STOP IT!!!! The coffee hurts when it sprays from the nose!

wareagle69
03-11-2008, 08:15 PM
Around here ( upper mid-west) most outhouses are two holers. Not one above the other... I can not imagine wanting to share the event with someone. Just makes you go nah.

i'll make the deduction that you have never been in prison or the military boy i remember sitting around with 12 other blokes talking how when we got home how nice it would be to sit in the can and read all by your lonesome self and not have anyone yell "hey put some air on that"

crashdive123
03-11-2008, 08:30 PM
Man, you Army guys had it rough. All we had to worry about was an over pressurized san tank, and blowing poo all over yourself.

Alpine_Sapper
03-11-2008, 08:42 PM
Never had to worry about that in the army. Jail, however, was a different story. Some pods have the crapper in the middle of the dayroom.

rebel
03-11-2008, 10:21 PM
i'll make the deduction that you have never been in prison or the military boy i remember sitting around with 12 other blokes talking how when we got home how nice it would be to sit in the can and read all by your lonesome self and not have anyone yell "hey put some air on that"

Did the military and worked the prison. Somehow doing what you need in front of strangers didn't matter. I can't imagine mom or sis next to me and latter at the dinner table. Did I draw a picture?

rebel
03-11-2008, 10:42 PM
Never had to worry about that in the army. Jail, however, was a different story. Some pods have the crapper in the middle of the dayroom.

Why you don't want the bottom rack.

bulrush
03-13-2008, 03:55 PM
If a family of 20 has the stomach flu, baby you need a lot of holes....

That just sounds unpleasant.

Anyway, if all holes are filled, just sit on the bottom person's lap, they are sure to tell ya if you have bad aim. Although I have to admit, that with certain stomach ailments, aim is not possible. It just goes where it goes.

Ole WV Coot
03-13-2008, 05:01 PM
Two holes are handy. Met my first ex that way, in the dark of course we had a little modesty. I think we fought over the yellow index in the catalog and the loser got stuck with the slick paper. I never forgave her for that.

GVan
03-15-2008, 12:01 AM
Hey Bragg, Those city folks just have no sense of the rediculus.


Rebel, When and where you in Korea?